Winter Solstice – Time to Celebrate Change || By Catherine Dockery, MA, Conscious Aging Facilitator
Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.
–Rumi
All is well – Namaste!
Nothing signifies change more than the winter solstice. Since prehistory, the winter solstice has been a significant time of year in most cultures. It marks the symbolic death and rebirth of the Sun.
In our modern world, it marks the end of the year as well as end of the season. We may love to burrow into our homes and wait out the dark and cold months of winter. Thankfully, nature allots a good amount of time for rest and replenishment before a new beginning that comes later in the spring.
In this dark and quiet of December, we might consider taking the time and space to integrate the past year while allowing something new to take hold.
As I age, I have greater appreciation for a natural lifestyle, seeking simpler ways of doing things. When I take time to just be, I create space with all that surrounds me. I feel my part in the whole of things. Consequently, I often find beauty initially hidden from sight.
Change is often perceived as wholly negative, especially as we try to hold onto the past. Change is seen as something to be resisted or battled. To advance a more productive conversation on change, we need strategies to recognize change as a continuous process of life that involves both opportunities and challenges.
For these reasons, let us contemplate letting go of the past before we rush into the new year. Here are some ways to reflect on the past year by purposely bringing past energies to intentional completion, thus allowing something new to take hold and emerge.
How to Bring To Completion
Completion starts with the awareness that nothing more can be done to move something from the past forward. You have to take responsibility for everything around yourself, and decide that completion is necessary.
Completion with others is not saying ‘I am sorry’, it is not apologizing. It is not about being wrong or right. Completion comes out of responsibility, not out of powerlessness. Feeling sorry comes from powerlessness. Instead, we decide to drop the past regardless of its incomplete state.
This action can be taken before doing your vision boards in the next year. First, spend some time at this year’s ending with a ritual of completion. Start the completion with everything with which you are living – your finances, your health, your home, your relationships, your pets, your car, your work. All these are living parts of your life. It’s a very important component of your life.
First thing you need to make a list of all those you want to bring completion and follow these steps:
Step One – Preparation
The first step is that you invoke the person or activity with whom you feel requires your acknowledgement. Make a list of all the people, events, disappointments, failures, near-misses, etc. Invoke each one and journal about them. Fully acknowledge the energies and issues still outstanding.
Do this processing as much as you need to take away the anger, vengeance, misunderstandings, and suppressions you have. Let that come out first. Let yourself be healed. All that anger, vengeance – everything will come out through this initial processing. You can work on it alone or with a supportive facilitator.
Step Two – Practice
Then you will sit in front of a mirror. You will invoke the person/event in the mirror and practice communicating your intention. Tell them, ‘I am deciding to drop a hurting pattern in my life.’ It could also be that you are dropping any incompletion, misunderstanding, etc. You communicate your intention to drop it and not bring it forward, to not give it life again.
Notice any desire to say “you are wrong, you are right.” It is not apologizing. It is not feeling sorry for the past. Instead you declare, ‘I am dropping this incompletion, left over from the past and I will not allow this to happen anymore.’
Do this until you feel the certainty of your intention.
Step Three – Reach out
Now you reach out to the actual person. Call them, and take full responsibility to drop the past and start with the new space of completion.
When you call, you explain, ‘This is what has been perceived by me. I am not interested in who is right or wrong.’ That will only create more and more anger, hatred and suppressed violence. You say, “I am ready to drop the past incompletion. I am declaring that I am dropping the past and I am complete.’ Your decision and declaration, when it reaches other person, will open the possibility for them to follow your lead and drop the past as well. You may say,
“You are an important person in my life and I don’t want to carry the past. This, this, this, this …. has happened. Now I am realizing that who is right and who is wrong is not the important thing. I am responsible, so I am deciding to take the responsibility and bring completion.”
Even if that person has done something wrong and they are the reason for the incompletion, I am going to be responsible for the completion. So I am not bothered about ‘you may be the reason’ or not, but I am going to take responsibility for the completion.
Anyone who desires to take charge of their own wellness and would like motivation and inspiration to make wise choices. Imagine a world where you can change with vitality, purpose and self-acceptance.
About the author: Rev. Catherine Dockery, MA, is a People House minister and a trained facilitator in conscious aging, nonviolent communication and resonant healing of trauma. She has an MA in Public Administration and BA in Communications both from the University of Colorado at Denver. Catherine started The Center for Conscious Aging in 2015 where she conducts workshops, personal coaching and support groups for older adults helping them to understand their developmental changes and transform their lives. She has 10 years of experience in individual and group facilitation and presents on aging topics throughout Colorado. To learn more about Catherine’s services please visit www.centerforconsciousaging.org or email [email protected]
