Always Hungry ll By Erin Amundson

Always Hungry
Erin Amundson, MA, LPC

As we approach the end of year and once again settle into the darkness of night, I’m encouraged to share a poem I wrote several years back.  The essence of the poem rings true for me again today, in the way that cyclical aspects of our core growth journey always do.  I’ll let you take in the poetry first, and then invite you in for more to consider.  Enjoy.  The poem is called Always Hungry

Dark stillness calls; For you I lose sleep

At the worry and the wonder

Of where I might find you next.

We had such a promising love affair once

My cold and starved curiosity

Exploring the depths you hid from me

Child-like, the two of us.  Child-like and afraid.

Then the world pounced, rushed me from behind,

and flung me, face-first, into the sunlight on the concrete.

Yes, the world took a cheap shot; And I quickly forgot you

To save the pain of remembering; All the others.

Yes I forgot, I forgot 

But still you didn’t leave me

You’ve held me all these years

You’ve held me so long I no longer know

How badly I want to go.

and nothing has changed, nothing has changed but me.  I’ve aged.

Aged and not grown, not moved, not known.  A life lived in circles, so perfect,

so hurtful.  Disturbing and peaceful. 

I practice Jungian Psychotherapy professionally.  I like to refer to it more often as Depth Psychotherapy, because while Jung is one of my heroes in passing, not everyone associates his name with what he actually taught.

In addition to spreading this knowledge and these practices to my clients, I have a thriving practice of my own, in my own home.  I have no memory of writing this poem, but my writing is a part of my practice.  In reviewing it, it’s clear to my ego mind that the poem was a message from my psyche (or soul, or God, or the universe) about the subtle presence of a recurring relationship pattern that’s self-destructive for me. Something I can surely interrupt in favor of what my soul truly wants to experience in this life. Powerful.  Simple. Profound.

As I reflect on the message of this poem, I recognize that I’ve had self-destructive relationships with all kinds of people and substances and behaviors throughout my life. 

I feel like I am at the beginning of the end of engaging this self-sabotage in favor a life really lived.  And as this poem from the past showed itself to me again today, I wonder how many people in the world might relate to the urge to let go of outdated self-sabotage in favor of a fresh start. 

While we are all unique in what we’re called to, it occurred to me this week that some of you out there might benefit from my sharing of this work, in the hope of inspiring you toward a practice that works for you.

I will first say that your psyche (or soul, or God) communicates with you regularly, whether you’re picking up what it’s laying down or not. 

If you start the interaction, your psyche will gladly engage you and give you your own form of soul communication. 

This communication comes in the form of intuition, dreams, interactions with others, repeating themes (numbers, pictures, words) in the world, and perhaps most importantly, creativity.

Your psyche tells you a story – often like a cliff hanger television series – one episode at a time.  If you tune in regularly, you get the larger themes and deeper meaning of the story.  However, if you’re missing several episodes, it’s easy to get lost in the mundane territory of our ego thoughts, fears and desires.  

One of the most powerful ways I have found to tune into the psyche is through a creativity practice. 

This can take so many forms – some of which include art, music, writing, cooking, or even quieting your mind and taking in the creative works of another. This time of year is perfect timing to tune in and go deeper.  Soon enough, we’ll be encouraged once again by the longer days to be out in the world.  For now, allow the natural rhythm to invite you in. 

This holiday season, I would encourage you to engage with your creative self and bring the intention of opening a dialogue with your psyche to your practice. You don’t have to try hard, in fact it’s best if you don’t try at all, but rather, simply show up to the process of creativity with an intention and an open mind.  I would bet your psyche has been waiting to spend more quality time in deep conversation with you.  And when you break through into awareness, life becomes so much more rich, colorful and meaningful.  Mmmmm.  It’s goooood stuff.


 

Erin Amundson loves helping people reconnect to their natural technology by decoding the language of dreams.  She is a healer, a depth psychologist and an entrepreneur who specializes in teaching people how to identify and remove barriers to success and make friends with their subconscious mind.  As the creator and founder of Natural Dream Technology, Erin knows that hidden beneath the surface of your conscious mind is a uniquely talented visionary, and she wants the world to benefit from your contribution. 

After several fights with her own subconscious mind (and a re-occurring nightmare about skipping classes and failing), Erin finally surrendered and followed the wisdom of her natural technology to get a second graduate degree in Counseling at Regis University.  A life-long follower of dreams, Erin now began to learn the language of the subconscious as she slept.  Just as Albert Einstein, Steve Jobs and Steven Spielberg all experienced, Erin began to recognize in her dreams that her best work is to help you reclaim your connection to your own natural technology through dreams and the subconscious.  She has been teaching, facilitating and engaging in dream work with ambitious professionals ever since. 

Erin currently practices as a depth psychotherapist in Denver, Colorado and via the internet around the world.  In addition to her dream work, Erin is a certified past life regressionist, an intuitive astrologer and a lover of travel, snowboarding, deep conversations and cooking delicious food, all of which she enjoys practicing while she sleeps.

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